The Unknown
by allirequest
Summary: Between the betrayal and the beginning of the Winter War, the kids in the real world aren't the only ones healing, growing, and moving on. An interlude with Kira/Hinamori.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **The Unknown

**Author: **Cayt

**Pairing: ** Kira Izuru/ Hinamori Momo

**Rating:** PG-13

**Summary:** Interlude. In the time between Aizen's betrayal and the Winter War, Ichigo and his friends are not the only ones healing, growing, and moving on.

**Disclaimer:** Bleach and all characters therein belong to Tite Kubo, the creator, not me. I'm just a poor college student… I have nothing of value, really!

~*~

**Part One**

**~*~**

"Hinamori, watch it!" A voice snapped, and she whirled to deflect a blow from the Hollow's tentacle just in time. Her feet slid through the dirt as the force behind the blow thrust her backwards, though she was gone before the Hollow's next tentacle lashed out. She nodded toward the owner of the voice briefly, still focused on the target.

Steadying Tobiume in front of herself, Momo whispered the familiar incantation under her breath before thrusting her other palm toward the Hollow, power rushing up and out easily. Her voice carried clearly as she snapped, "Sōren sōkatsui*!"

There was one last unearthly howl as the Hollow was destroyed, leaving Momo to lower her zanpakutō. It had been a long time since they had been in direct combat, and it felt almost like coming home; Tobiume obviously agreed, her satisfaction humming in the back of Momo's mind. Sheathing her blade, she allowed her fingertips to wistfully brush against the guard before glancing up to her observers.

In the last few weeks, she had been working relentlessly to regain her strength back. She had finally been allowed to return to her squad after her hospitalization, and it actually felt more like she'd been released from imprisonment. As friendly and helpful as the Fourth Division was, she was far from stupid; it wasn't hard to sense the watchful eyes and the guarded, stilted nature of their conversation. The only thing worse than being watched constantly, however, was the underlying pity in their gaze. It stung, knowing that things would never be the same, and that they wouldn't stop looking at her like that for quite some time.

She was still in a daze when she had finally returned to the Fifth Division; everything _looked_ the same on the surface, but nothing was ever going to be the same again. It only took a few hours to realize that she was just as alone here as she had been in the hospital ward. Despite the numbers of acquaintances and Fourth Division officers stopping by to chat with her, she was still alone. Everyone else was preparing for war; everyone else believed that Aizen-taichou was the enemy, shooting still more pitying looks her way when they thought she wasn't looking.

Now, however, she returned to the side of her observers, face grim with determination as officers from the First, Second, and Fourth Divisions studied her closely. She cast her eyes to the ground as they watched her, fighting the urge to tremble under the weight of their stares—after all, this wasn't just a judgment of her skill, but of whether or not they thought she should retain her position as fukutaichou just yet.

"Hinamori-fukutaichou, well done," a voice finally said, and she looked up, startled. "We'll return to the Seireitei now."

Momo nodded respectfully. Without further delay, they returned through the Senkaimon; her observers wasted no time once back in Soul Society, leaving her alone on the training fields they had departed from earlier. After a moment, she turned back in the direction of her division; while her training was done for now, there was still plenty of work to be done. Without Aizen-taichou, it fell to her to keep the division functioning. She had to take care of the paperwork, assign missions, and supervise… none of it was new to her, but Aizen had always been there to help alleviate the worst of it—he had always been so kind that way…

Shaking her head slightly, Momo bit her lip as she shoved those thoughts away. She couldn't afford to think like that. It was a betrayal to the rest of her squad, to keep thinking of Aizen as if he were coming back… a betrayal to Soul Society, a betrayal to her friends… but wasn't it a betrayal to him, too, to keep pushing Aizen-taichou from her thoughts like this?

Frowning, Hinamori continued her path back toward her Division, lost in thought. Night was beginning to fall over the Seireitei, elongating the shadows on the ground and painting the white buildings in shades of creamy peach and deep violet. Mindlessly, she continued through the familiar streets, though she didn't take any of the shortcuts she knew by heart. The extra time allowed her more space to herself, with the added benefit of being able to avoid the constant pitying stares that she seemed to attract lately.

"Momo!" A sudden voice cut into her thoughts, jolting the young woman from her semi-daze. She jumped as a familiar figure landed in front of her, a faint smile on his face.

"K-Kira-kun," she stammered, eyes wide for a moment before she smiled shakily. "What are you doing here?"

"You're by the Third Division training grounds," he said softly, amused. "I'm supposed to be here… so, I think the question is, what are you doing over here?" He was rewarded when her smile became firmer, more honest and _real_, something he hadn't seen in a long time.

"Oh, I was just out for a walk," Momo replied, relaxing. It had been quite a while since she had had the chance to catch up with Izuru; they had both been put in charge of their respective divisions, taking up the slack that had left behind in the wake of their captains, making it hard to have time to meet up with others outside of their own squad. He had somehow made time to stop in and visit her, however, while she was in the Fourth Division. It made up for the gaping hole left by recent events in a minor way, especially when she realized that Tōshirō wouldn't be able to visit her. She understood that he was needed in the real world for the time being, but his absence was just another reminder of everything that had happened; after all, whenever she was wounded before, he had always stopped by, even if it was only to tease her into a better mood.

"At this hour?" Izuru asked, glancing at her curiously. She nodded slightly, then shifted as he remembered. "Oh. The observations?"

"Yes," she replied, taking a small step forward. Kira followed without comment, something she was grateful for. It was always nice to see Kira or Abarai Renji when she could, though admittedly that was getting more and more difficult. "Today was the last session… I should hear the results in the next couple of days, don't you think?"

"Or sooner," he commented, frowning. "Since we're still getting ready for the war, they'll want to have everything in order as soon as possible. You'll probably hear tomorrow, Momo."

"You're right," Momo responded, thinking for a moment, then smiled sheepishly. She shouldn't have needed the reminder… it was all anyone talked about anymore, and she knew that she still needed to attend to the training of her squad to prepare them. Since she had been so busy lately, however, it had made it hard to train them _and_ pay attention to her own re-training.

They walked in silence for a few moments, at a slow enough pace to observe the setting sun. It was reassuring, to be able to walk with Izuru without feeling pressured to talk… the forced, stilted conversations that everyone else felt obligated to have with her were, while polite and sometimes pleasant enough, still enough to wear her down. Aside from turning them away, however, there was really no way to avoid them without appearing rude or hurting feelings; all they wanted was to make sure she was okay…

Kira, however, was different. They had known each other for long enough now that there was no need for constant conversation between them. Whenever Renji was there, completing the group, the atmosphere changed; the redhead had always been bolder and louder, creating a warmth of loud, friendly conversation that was hard to resist. Despite their positions within different divisions, it was still nice to meet up with the other two, and in some ways, it sometimes felt like nothing had changed. When it was just her and Kira, though, it was still nice, a comfortable quiet time.

It wasn't long before they reached the outer limits of the Fifth Division, and wordlessly Momo paused before entering the gates, looking up at Kira and smiling once more.

"It was good to see you again, Kira-kun," she admitted, and he offered a trace of a smile in return.

"Same here," he said, then shrugged slightly with one shoulder. "You're starting the training with your division tomorrow, right?"

"Yes," Momo said, nodding. "They've already been working, but tomorrow I start training with them again. I hope they've been working hard…" Kira nodded, a distant look in his eyes for a brief second before it disappeared.

"We all have," he murmured, then glanced at her once more. "When you're done, if you want more training, feel free to stop by the Third's training fields."

"Thanks, Kira-kun," she replied, smiling brightly. "I'll try to stop by, okay?" He nodded in response, watching as Momo finally turned and retreated into the yards of her division, before heading out himself.

~*~

The next day found Momo wiping the sweat from her brow as she straightened from her half-crouch, surveying the ranks of shinigami before her. They had been training hard for a few hours now, some practicing better swordsmanship, some practicing their kidō techniques, and others practicing other techniques. They were doing well, though some of the newer members of the division looked as if they were ready to drop from exhaustion—these were the ones that were going to need the most work, she thought grimly.

Then again, she wasn't all that far from the edge of exhaustion herself. All of the recent excursions to the real world to dispatch Hollows and to the training grounds for examinations were enough to wear anyone down…

_But maybe that was the point,_ she thought, disappointed. She only allowed the thought to linger for a moment, however, before chasing it away. _No. I won't think that way!_

Blinking, Momo glanced over the shinigami before her once more before signaling them to a halt.

"That's enough for today!" She called, raising her voice to carry across the yard. "We'll pick this up tomorrow—don't be late!"

The yard cleared relatively quickly, though her sharp eye caught more than a few of her members limping or carrying themselves stiffly—but strangely enough, no one was complaining. She frowned slightly; how hard had they been training while she was busy? It didn't look as if this was the first time they had been pushed this far…

"Welcome back, Hinamori-fukutaichou," more than a few murmured on their way past, and she was surprised to note the pleased looks in their expressions. She mumbled responses automatically, unaware of exactly what she was saying.

"Wow, looks like they're glad to have you back, huh?" A wry voice commented, and Momo whirled, startled. In her surprise, however, she ran face first into a wall of black, freezing before pulling back.

"Kira-kun!" She exclaimed, eyes wide. "When did you get here?"

"A few minutes ago," Izuru replied, eyes watching the exit of the last few shinigami. "I thought you'd have been done training earlier than this."

"They wanted to keep going," Momo replied, frowning slightly as she glanced across the empty training fields wistfully. "Everyone's really working hard…"

"They have good reason," he commented, earning a confused look from the slighter lieutenant. "We all need to prove ourselves again."

"Y-yeah," she said, stuttering slightly at the reminder. Silence fell, jaggedly awkward, lasting for only a moment before she drew herself up, forcing her voice not to waver. "Are all the other divisions training as hard as this?"

"Pretty hard, yeah," Kira said, rolling his eyes up to focus on the sky for a brief second. "Eleventh Division's pretty much destroyed their training grounds, so they started using Twelfth… Kurotsuchi-taichou wasn't pleased."

"Wow, I wouldn't want to be near that area," Momo said, grateful that the awkwardness was blown away so easily, like so many grains of sand in the wind. "So have you heard from Abarai-kun lately? I know he went to the human realm with Hitsugaya-taichou, but I haven't had the chance to contact him…"

"They're keeping plenty busy over there," he replied, frowning. "Activity between Hueco Mundo has increased drastically—"

"Because the war's coming," Hinamori murmured, voice suddenly deadened. Izuru turned to face her, concern showing clearly, but the girl appeared not to see him any longer, her eyes instead focused on something distant. "We're going to have to fight against Aizen-taichou…"

"No," Kira said firmly, frown becoming more pronounced. "Aizen and the others are no longer captains, Hinamori-fukutaichou. They are traitors."

"Aizen…" she whispered, eyes still glazed and different. Kira stared for a long moment, unsure. Hinamori had been fine only a moment before, but one absent mention of the war still caused her to shut down, he noted. She couldn't afford to have a relapse now; she had just finished her observation period and proven herself, but if she showed any signs of not being up to the task of facing her old captain, command would have no qualms about detaining her once more. As it stood, there were those within the ranks of the Gotei that still believed that she posed a risk—that she would continue to follow her former captain blindly. For a brief second, Kira's own steady belief in her wavered, before resolving once more. He had known the girl for decades now; despite her blind devotion to the traitor Aizen, she was, above all, kind-hearted and a firm believer in what was right.

He opened his mouth to say something, only to be startled as Momo's eyes suddenly cleared, her stance straightening as she blinked, then blushed.

"O-oh, Izuru," she stammered, unable to meet his concerned gaze. "Sorry! I guess I just got distracted, huh?"

"Momo—" he started, then paused, unsure of what to say. "Are you sure you're ready for this?"

The girl looked at the ground, falling silent for a moment. A faint breeze stirred the air, disturbing the silence with the whispers of clothing and hair. The sounds of other shinigami close by were carried over the wall, though the expectant silence made the close reiatsu seem veiled, distant.

"No," she whispered, sounding almost ashamed. "But I have to be. Aizen's never coming back, and the division needs a leader, someone to help them get ready… I can't be weak now! I can't let them all down again!"

"Hey, you've never—"

"Yes, I have!" Momo cut him off, her voice growing teary. "You think I don't hear them, Kira-kun? They all think I'm weak because I believed in him! They all think I'm weak because I let them down! When they needed me, I was… I wasn't here."

"Hinamori—" Kira tried again, only to be cut off once more. This time, however, it wasn't by another outburst from Momo, but an explosion from the wall to the left. The solid wall crumbled with a groan and a cloud of thick dust, though thankfully no debris was sent flying.

"Murakami, you moron! Now look what you did!"

"I _told_ you I couldn't do that stupid kidō, but you never listen! This one is totally your fault!"

"Hinamori? Are you okay?" Kira asked, turning away from the argument over the wall. She nodded, a faint smile on her face as she sighed—whether from exasperation or from relief at the interruption, he wasn't quite sure.

"I'm fine, Izuru," she replied, glancing up at him. "I should probably go check on that…"

"I know," he shrugged, one corner of his mouth twitching up in a smile. "We'll train together another time."

She nodded, though he could sense that her attention had already drifted to the situation at hand. He took his leave with a nod, leaving her to sigh once more, this time in resignation, before flash-stepping across the wreckage of the training grounds' west wall, coming to a rest in front of two younger shinigami, both of whom froze at her appearance.

"Hinamori-fukutaichou!" They both said, eyes wide in horror. "S-sorry, ma'am!"

"What _happened_?" She asked incredulously, staring at the smoking ruins of the wall in something like vague amazement. "We're done training for today, remember?"

~*~

Kira didn't bother to turn on the lights in his office upon his return. Instead, he usually preferred the faint shadows cast by the sunlit windows to the artificial light. Ichimaru had always hated his methods, insisting that the lights be kept on even when the sun was the brightest. Knowing him, of course, he had done it just to get on Kira's nerves... Pacing over to the desk, he spared the day's paperwork a cursory glance before settling into the chair.

Seeing Momo so distant and distracted had disturbed him, more deeply than he had thought at first. He knew that the wounds from Aizen's betrayal ran deep, deeper than the physical wounds that had almost killed her, though he still worried. Would Hinamori ever truly recover? It had always been easy to tell that she was close to her captain, making the betrayal that much more painful to her; despite the fact that Kira and Hisagi Shūhei had also been betrayed by their captains, admittedly neither had been quite as close to their captain as she had, taking away some of the intense pain.

Even if Momo fully recovered, however, there were still plenty of questions that remained—questions voices in whispers between friends, never loud enough to be concrete, but yet still frequent enough to spread dissention and even condemnation amongst the Divisions.

Had Hinamori-fukutaichou _really_ recovered, or was she just pretending? Was she going to follow her beloved captain, even now? And what about Kira-fukutaichou and Hisagi-fukutaichou? Surely they must have at least _suspected_ their captains of something! After all, they were some of the brightest and most admired of the lieutenants… they had to have known something! Kira widely ignored the rumors and whispers. He knew he had been used, and he knew that the important people—such as the remaining captains of the Gotei 13, the current lieutenants, and some of the older shinigami in the Division—also knew that he was innocent, a victim of Gin and Aizen's manipulation. What the others thought didn't really matter to him; he had more pressing matters to worry about beyond correcting everyone's assumptions.

With the war coming up and Ichimaru gone, all of the work had fallen to him. That, in itself, was no big deal; instead, the difficulty came from training with his squad. Izuru had worked hard to establish himself once more within his Division after everything that had happened. Amidst the doubts circulating, he also had to deal with the fact that he wasn't exactly an ideal leader, especially for a disgraced, discouraged squad. Nothing about Kira screamed "leader," a fact that had raised further doubts in the already-shaky ranks; he was quiet, somewhat depressing, and largely kept to himself.

Hisagi Shūhei, however, had had no problem establishing his authority within the Ninth Division—after all, one didn't just become lieutenant of the Gotei 13 with a winning smile and a good sense of humor. As acting captain, he knew where he stood, and the members of his Division followed him without question. Sometimes, Kira wished he possessed that same confidence, that same _presence_, and yet… it wasn't him. Hisagi-sempai was someone he admired, but if Kira were to change his methods now, it would only incur more doubt. No, instead, he had to continue as he always had… though there was questioning within his ranks, he knew that there was no doubt about his ability. He may not inspire hope and happiness in his subordinates, but that did not make him weak.

Despite Kira's self-assurance, the problem appeared most clearly during their training sessions. While the shinigami worked to hone their skills, it became apparent that, though they were determined to succeed and prove themselves, there was no… real confidence to be found, only a grim determination.

Fighting, and the prospect of the upcoming war, provided more than enough reason to be grim. War only brought misery and despair to all involved, whether they were involved directly or even indirectly. Constant fighting brought pain and destruction, shattering any hope and peace in the area. While sometimes war was necessary in order to obtain peace, the knowledge that a large scale war was looming ever closer didn't ease Kira's mind at all.

This, however, was one war that would be unavoidable for all involved.

~*~

It was early in the morning, early enough that the only people moving about in the gray pre-dawn light were the assigned guards—and even they were moving slowly and sluggishly. The patrols lingered briefly at the edges of the Fifth Division, curious of the figure out so early, yet disappearing once more as soon as they realized who it was.

Despite the faint morning mist lingering in the pale gray air, Momo was wide awake. She had slept well last night, though she had inexplicably woken far earlier than needed. Unable to return to sleep, she had instead risen and gone back to the training grounds, taking advantage of their empty state at this hour.

Aware of the occasional observing gaze, Momo worked her way through a set of exercises, stretching and preparing to train for a while. To the outsiders, her face was calm and composed, her beautiful eyes serious, lit by an inner determination. After stretching, she unsheathed Tobiume, progressing smoothly into an intricate dance. Tobiume's blade glinted faintly in the early morning light, cutting easily through the still air as Momo's body fell into a familiar rhythm and pattern.

_Extend, block, turn, block, shift, strike, follow through, crescent sweep, duck..._ There was no sound in the yard save for the soft scuff of her sandals in the dirt or the sound of her shihakusho ruffling slightly as she moved. The air parted with increasing sound as Hinamori sped the routine up, adding more steps as she went.

Her breathing remained steady, evidence of accustomed endurance, though she could feel her adrenaline beginning to rise. The rush of energy felt good, filling her up with a confidence and peace that she hadn't felt in a long time.

As she let her body settle into the routine, Momo felt Tobiume's calm satisfaction in the back of her mind, reassuring in the same manner as the warm sun on her cheeks in summer. It was easy to connect with her zanpakutō on a deeper level, adding a new degree of comfort to the already-relaxing routine. Things were finally getting back on track… for the longest time, even when simply warming up, Tobiume's concern for her had always lingered on the back of Momo's mind, hindering her ability to connect fully with her zanpakutō—and reducing her effectiveness.

_Welcome back, Hinamori-kun,_ Tobiume whispered, and the lieutenant let a small smile grace her lips as she drew to a smooth stop. Her blade was held in front of her, as if poised at an enemy's throat, her body balanced and positioned just right to allow her to either escape or pursue her line of attack as needed, and she nodded to herself before straightening and lowering Tobiume.

_It has been a while, hasn't it?_ She asked silently, receiving a light bubble of happiness in the back of her awareness as a means of reply. Pleased, she carefully sheathed Tobiume once more, aware of the eyes lingering on her once more. Turning, she nodded to the patrol team, who nodded sharply in response before disappearing—a small sign of normalcy. She knew these men, had nodded to them before in the early dawn hours…

Maybe there was a way to fix things after all.

~*~

* _Sōren sōkatsui_ translates to "Twin Lotus Blue Fire, Crash Down," which is hadō 73—also the same as 33, only doubled.

~*~

**Notes:** The next few parts are really coming along well, so those should be up relatively soon. The prequel to this, "Distress, De-Stress, and Forgive" is already up, so take a look at that if you would like. As always, feedback (esp. concrit about any bad characterization!) is loved and welcomed :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: **The Unknown

**Author: **Cayt

**Pairing: ** Kira Izuru/ Hinamori Momo

**Rating:** PG-13

**Summary:** Interlude. In the time between Aizen's betrayal and the Winter War, Ichigo and his friends are not the only ones healing, growing, and moving on.

**Disclaimer:** Bleach and all characters therein belong to Tite Kubo, the creator, not me. I'm just a poor college grad… I have nothing of value, really!

~*~

**Part Two**

~*~

_The darkness of the night was shattered by bright, beautiful colors, the fireworks lighting up the sky. A soft smile pulled at her lips, especially when she looked over at Shiro-chan. Even though he was a captain now, he would always be her little brother; he had grown more mature (but not much taller!) in the last few years, certainly, but that soft smile that he usually tried to hide was still there. His whole face was softer and so young with that expression—though he would yell and scowl if she ever told him that—and Momo wanted to ruffle his hair._

_It was _really_ nice of Aizen-taichou to take time out to come sit with them and watch the fireworks. He wasn't even all that close to Hitsugaya-kun, but he had come out here for _her_, to keep her company. Not many of the other captains would do that, she was sure._

_As they walked back, Momo couldn't keep the smile from her face. She was so glad that Shiro-chan had had a good birthday, and that her captain was so nice, so caring… she actually felt comfortable around him now, unlike the first few times she had ever even seen him. There was nothing she wouldn't do to help him—certainly, she would never be his equal, but she would serve Aizen-taichou proudly until the day she died. She was so… happy under his leadership, her life feeling… complete._

"… _Lovely fireworks tonight, weren't they, Hinamori-kun?" Aizen was saying, and she flushed nervously upon realizing she hadn't even paid attention to him at first… nodding, however, she offered a small smile—and was rewarded with a gentle, warm smile in return._

"_Very pretty," she agreed quietly, content. "And Hitsugaya-taichou was pleased as well… thank you, Aizen-taichou."_

"_It's no problem at all," he reassured her. "Hitsugaya-taichou is lucky to have such a caring friend as you… and I'm lucky to have such a caring subordinate." Momo blushed at the praise, a small, pleased smile flickering over her lips and a warmth growing in her chest—_

_Just as pain erupted, sharp and jagged as blood seeped thickly through her clothes. She choked (on the pain, on the blood, on the _betrayal), _looking up at Aizen, who was still smiling so warmly…_

_And the expression had never made him uglier._

~*~

With a sharp gasp, Momo jerked awake, her hand flying to the center of her torso. The familiar ceiling of her room greeted her, and she forced her body to relax, spending a long few minutes regaining precious breath.

While she had been declared fully recovered, the ache in the center of her chest was almost enough to make her think otherwise. Her fist was clenched tightly in the fabric of her night clothes, knuckles white from her grip, even as the healed wound seemed to _throb,_ painfully aware of the scar that marred her torso now. The ghostly pain paralyzed her now, even as she stared at the ceiling through teary eyes.

That memory… had been one of her most precious. Hitsugaya-kun had been pleased that night, relaxed in a way she hadn't seen in a while, and Aizen-taichou… Aizen had actually cared—_pretended he cared, you mean_, a nasty voice reminded, and Momo blinked away tears.

Unfortunately, she had no idea whether the tears were from anger or sadness—or which was worse.

~*~

The day seemed to pass by in a daze for Kira Izuru; things had settled into a grim routine, and thankfully, that was enough for now. The lull was a false one, of course, but then, the lull was far from being wasted.

Outside, the day was drawing to an end, the eerie shadows of early twilight creeping through the office. He hadn't heard from Hinamori at all in the last couple of days, which was worrisome. She was busy, certainly, but he hoped she was doing alright; her dazed confusion the other afternoon had concerned him. Perhaps he should—

"Oi, Kira," a voice called, and Izuru shook himself from his daze with a small frown. He'd actually forgotten where he was for a moment, and now, Hisagi Shūhei was looking at him, dark eyes piercing. Over his abandoned cup of tea, his sempai was looking at him in faint concern, and he shrugged sheepishly. "What has you so distracted?"

"Nothing, just… thinking," Kira replied, pushing his cup of tea away. He certainly wished they were drinking something more substantial, but then again, he had certainly spent enough time in a daze lately. That, of course, was partly (mostly) Matsumoto-fukutaichou's influence, but right now, he needed to be alert in order to help prepare for the coming war.

"About?" Hisagi prodded after a long moment, and Kira couldn't help but frown. Usually, the other man wouldn't push the issue; neither of them were exactly the type to have a heart-to-heart, let alone confide their innermost thoughts. Apparently, he had been lost in his own thoughts longer than he had supposed if it was alarming Hisagi this much.

It wasn't something they talked about; they had both been betrayed by their captains, left behind and thrown aside as so much trash… after they had fulfilled their purpose, of course. Even though it had been weeks since the events, it was just something that they didn't talk about, aside from the acknowledgement that this had been unexpectedly painful.

"Hinamori," he replied finally, frowning at the tabletop. "She… I'm not sure she's completely okay yet."

"It's going to be a while before any of us are," Hisagi said darkly, eyes hard and distant. "She was closest to her captain out of the three of us… she's got to be really confused and hurt."

"I know," Izuru replied quietly, hurt. Of course he understood that much; after all, the three of them had all been abandoned by their captains, perhaps the most betrayed within the Soul Society. They had worked under their respective captains for years, closely, relying on them, helping them, _trusting them_…

Kira Izuru didn't trust easily, not anymore. It had been a long time since he had been carefree, but those he let get close, he trusted implicitly—and would do anything for them. He doubted anyone—save perhaps Ichimaru—knew exactly how much it had torn him apart to draw his blade against Momo in order to defend his captain. He utterly regretted it now, of course… and Ichimaru had _known_ exactly what he was doing. It had been a game to him, all of it, and that… that was unforgiveable.

"I think she still believes that Aizen is good," Kira said finally, frowning. Hisagi leaned forward slightly, and Kira paused. Would his sempai report this back to the Fourth, or the First? After all, Hinamori had only just been cleared to return to her Division, but was still under watch… No.

Hisagi Shūhei was one of the very few that Kira trusted anymore; his sempai was one of his closest friends. He wouldn't go behind his back, not unless Hinamori was truly a threat. If that was the case, however, Kira would be the first to seek help for Momo. He cared a great deal for her, and had for a long time; to see her hurting like this was a painful thing for him to watch, and he wished Abarai was here as well. Renji knew how to make Momo laugh, and right now, he would give almost anything to have the redhead here to help. Maybe that was what was missing…

"She'll come around," Shūhei finally predicted, much to Kira's relief. "Hinamori's strong; she just needs some time. Her idolization of Aizen scares some, you know?"

"I know," Izuru agreed. To be honest, it was; he had never dared speak up, but even back in their Academy days, Momo's hero worship of Aizen had been intimidating. Sure, he had rescued them from certain death, and had guided them through the ranks, helping them each to find a place in a Division, but that level of admiration was… incredible, for lack of a better word. What if he had admired Ichimaru that much?

Kira winced at that thought; while he and Ichimaru had gotten along, the man had always been off-putting, keeping everyone at a distance with that constant smile and his belittling attitude. The games he played…

"I think she's getting past that," Kira continued, his frown softening without his knowledge. "Hinamori-kun always does what's right; that's what makes her strong."

Hisagi glanced at him knowingly, even as Kira caught the expression. He abruptly straightened, even as Hisagi sobered once more.

"Keep an eye on her and talk to her," he advised quietly, rising from his seat. "She knows what's right; Hinamori-fukutaichou will be fine. Now stop your worrying."

~*~

Later that evening, Kira found himself with nothing to do; Hisagi had paperwork to file for the _Seireitei Communication_, Matsumoto (and her sake collection) and Renji were both in the world of the living, and anyone else he might consider drinking with was otherwise occupied… but then, he supposed he didn't particularly feel like drinking. After all, the drunken daze he had spent that first week in after the betrayal had resulted in the worst hangover he could remember, and he was still firmly convinced that he was never going to drink again.

Instead, he made his way to the Fifth Division, intent on finding Hinamori. It didn't take long until he found her sitting atop her Division walls, staring up at the sky. Though she gave no verbal sign, she shifted slightly, indicating her acknowledgement of his arrival.

He stood for a moment before sitting down as well, glancing up at the hazy sky. The clouds were thin enough to give brief glimpses of the stars above here and there, glinting like dusty diamonds under a gauze veil. It was a cool night, calm and faintly breezy, ruffling Momo's hair as she finally turned to Kira.

"It's nice out tonight," she greeted, smiling faintly. Despite the familiar expression, her dark eyes were haunted, faint circles highlighting her tiredness. "It was really stuffy inside my room, so I came out here instead."

"You opened the windows to let a breeze in?" Kira asked absently, the expected response, and Momo nodded. "How was training today? Any more accidents?"

"No, not today," she responded, a faint smile easing the haunted look from her face. "I went to visit Granny today in Jurinran… it's been such a long time since I've gone to see her!"

Izuru only nodded, watching as Hinamori's entire demeanor shifted, her voice and expression lighting up with simple happiness, erasing the lingering darkness in her eyes. It was a reassuring sight, though he did feel a small twinge in response; it was so easy for others to earn a smiling response from her, and yet he couldn't seem to find the right thing to say to help. Abarai would be playing indifferent to her mood (when in actuality he was pretty intuitive to that sort of thing, as much as he tried to deny it), earning smiles and even laughter from her. Kira had never met Momo's adoptive grandmother, but she probably didn't have to try hard, either.

Kira, on the other hand, was at a complete loss. It wasn't really his nature to comfort, to crack jokes… but he wished deeply that he could coax that smile out as well.

"How is she doing?" He asked politely, and Momo smiled wistfully.

"She misses Shiro-chan and me," she admitted, looking slightly unhappy. "Neither of us have as much time to visit her anymore, but she's fine. She's looking after a new girl these days, so she's not so lonely."

"That's nice," he replied, granting her a small smile. "It's been a long time since I've been able to go home."

What he didn't mention, however, was that there was a reason for that; there was no one waiting there for him. Even though his parents had long since moved on in the cycle, Kira still retained the family home. It was nice, having a place to escape to in order to get away from the stress that the Seireitei held. On the other hand, it was also unbearably empty at times, the silent halls filled with the echoes of memories.

"I don't get to go home much anymore, either," Momo said sympathetically, frowning. "But sometimes, it's harder to go home than it is to just go on; things have changed so much…"

"I know," Kira agreed, leaning back. Once more, he found himself not knowing what to say. He had never been a particularly verbose man, and yet… now he found himself at a loss for words. Recent events weighed so heavily on them all, and it felt rather like tiptoeing around with Hinamori; to mention what was going on was to potentially open unhealed wounds, and with her looking as if she hadn't even slept in a few days, he didn't want to upset her.

"Izuru?" Momo asked, startling him from his reverie. The blond jolted slightly, then glanced over to meet concerned brown eyes. "I know I look bad, but… are you alright?"

"Me?" Izuru asked, surprised. Momo's honestly concerned eyes very nearly made him laugh at the absurdity of his being unwell, and he swallowed a wry chuckle. "I'm alright, Momo, just tired. It's been a busy few weeks…"

"I know how you feel," Hinamori admitted, smiling timidly. "It's still hard to believe..." Silence fell between them for a long moment, then Momo swallowed audibly.

"I keep thinking it's all a dream, Izuru-kun," she confided, eyes falling to the tiles beneath them. "Sometimes, it feels like it can't be real…"

"Unfortunately, it is real," Kira muttered, bowing his head slightly. Alongside him, Momo had gone tense again, and he forced himself to relax, shaking off the stray into negative territory that his mind had taken.

For a long time, both of them remained silent. Kira hated the silence; for all that it was a familiar silence—companionable, in the way that old, close friends often shared—it was also slightly uneasy, tainted by all that had changed, and all that would continue to change… Izuru didn't like it.

Shaking it off, Kira glanced up at the sky once more. As he did, Momo shifted slightly closer, her arm brushing against his. He inhaled slightly, startled, but then almost immediately relaxed. Kira shifted over slightly as well, affirming the contact so that Momo's arm brushed against his, her shoulder leaning into his side. His cheeks heated slightly, and he chanced a glance over to his friend. Momo was smiling happily, and this time, he was the cause.

Maybe this new touch of silence wasn't all that bad.

~*~

**A.N.** Okay, so, whoa, I lost like two months between updates! Sorry, sorry for all who have been waiting... I've been waiting tables full-time, and trying (and failing x.x) to pay back college loans. Ew! Anyway, long update short, I succeeded at NaNoWriMo, have been avoiding any form of writing as a result, and am now finally getting around to kicking this stuff off of my computer...

So, please, let me know what you think! I know this chapter is short, but I'm going to get my muse to give me longer chapters in the future, hopefully, if all goes well. Let me know what you think, what you like, and please, for the love of god, please tell me if I get OOC! If I do, that defeats the purpose (for me)... Enjoy!


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